Tuesday 26 May 2015

Wish You Were Here: Family Camping in Cumbria

I consider myself a pretty advanced camper. Although I haven't done much of it lately (last 25 years), my time in the Scouts as a youth and young adult taught me life-long lessons that have come in handy in many occasions. For instance, I know from 'The Great Winds Camp-Out' that even though dome tents are stable, if you don't peg them down, they will roll, and you and everything you own may end up sleeping on the roof. I know that Snipes do exist, and that they taste like chicken. And I know that bacon, yummy bacon, tastes better when sung to during its cooking. I learned lots of useful things in the scouts. What I learned this weekend, though - was that none of that prepared me for Camping with Kids.

Let me start by saying that the Kids - all eight of them aged eight or younger - were delightful. Everyone behaved, there weren't any unreasonable arguments and they had a blast. So this wasn't about THEM being particularly challenging. It's about me not being used to the difference between camping with people who can take care of themselves, and camping with people who think running around, near and over a flimsy portable BBQ is great fun and not at all life-threatening. Camping with Kids is Camping with People Who Don't Yet Know That They Are Mortal - and as important and liberating as that perspective is, it can be stressful when they are inherently in an environment where there is so much more than normal that can kill them, and it's your job to keep them safe from all of it.

But it's also your job to teach them how to engage with that environment, and to have fun doing it. And that, I think, is where I need to learn the most. How do you teach them the importance of improvisation by using 6" kebab skewers as marshmallow roasting sticks and ALSO teach them that sitting IN the fire is dangerous? How do you teach them to love hiking up a steep, rocky hill and ALSO teach them that running back down it can kill you? BBQ food is SUPPOSED to have 'bits' on it, air beds are MEANT to be squishy, taking you boots off before you get in the tent is not optional, sometimes 'because I said so' is reason enough, and so on. SO much learning.

And, if I'm honest, being a mostly-mute adult trying to manage all that learning is a real challenge. I'm not great at multi-tasking with kids at the best of times, but when you have an already air-riddled voice that disappears completely at anything above Loud Whispering, explaining, comforting, encouraging, congratulating and expressing wonderment are all physically difficult and psychologically exhausting. So forget about disciplining, calling out for, yelling or sometimes even being heard over the cacophony of kids learning to love the great outdoors. I'm afraid the result this weekend was, at times, a stressed-out ex-Scout, who may have appeared not to be enjoying himself.

But it was ever of the moment; the effort to find that balance and the temporary inability to Communicate got the better of me. But the frustration soon abated and I quickly found something to remind me what it was all about. Whether it was one child finding complete joy in a narrow-gauge steam train ride, or another falling asleep while still trying to eat an ice-cream cone, or the emotional penguin hug as all eight kids said their good-byes and promised to meet up again (next time at the beach) - they reminded me what It is all about. It's about them, and their relationships with each other and with camping. The fact that they all wanted to do it again next weekend means it was a success. I think I'll need a few weeks to recover first.

Postscript: I am very aware that any Scout leaders that may read this may be feeling more than a little content. It is likely that they will recognise some of the struggle and all of the joy I'm trying to convey - but I imagine that they will also have a rather smug smile of their faces as it dawns on me what I put them through. Touché, Dad and Brother Gilliland, touché.