Please help my child...

When I arrived home yesterday, I went upstairs (as I always do) to catch the last 10-15 minutes of my daughter's day. Usually, her last 2 or 3 stories are punctuated with games of peek-a-boo with Daddy (or da-DEE as she says) and high-fives (she even now makes the 'ssshht' sound as our hands meet) before she goes to bed and I go make dinner. To a point, yesterday was the same as every other weekday evening. Until I asked my wife how her day went. Instead of the usual, unexplored 'fine', she told me a story that really got my hackles up. Now, if you know me, you know that me getting my hackles up is different than when some people get their hackles up. For some, getting annoyed means getting angry... for my wife, it meant getting so riled up that she uncharacteristically ignored our daughter's pleas to be entertained. To the untrained observer, it may appear that I was unmoved by her story. But I guarantee you that I sat, I listened, and my hackles rose. Not my voice, or my heartbeat, or my stress... just my hackles. And when they get up, what I do is to explore solutions and to agree a way forward. Then I write.

The story she told me yesterday was one, sadly, of totally predicable circumstances. In a world so concerned with blame and so concerned with spurious litigation, my wife was told that, under no circumstances was she to give assistance to a child in need if their own medication was not available. Specifically, when dealing with a student who is need of the life-saving help that comes in an 'epi-pen', she was told that she could not administer the exact same medication from another child's epi-pen if the child in need did not have the appropriate medication with them (it was faulty, or out-of-date, or otherwise unavailable). The same restriction would apply to the application of a generic asthma pump: if the child's own was not available for whatever reason, she was not to administer the medication from anyone else's inhaler, even if it was demonstrably the exact same medication and dosage. 

You might think 'fair enough'; we're all told not to take someone else's medication. But what was the reason behind the advice...? Well, it wasn't because the child may be put at more danger by using someone else's medication. My wife asked, and was told that paediatric epi-pens are all the same (adult ones are different), and colour-coding on asthma pumps ensures that all blues are the same, etc. So using another child's epi-pen or inhaler would not put the child at more risk. So it's not about endangering the child. No, the reason for not giving potentially life-saving assistance to a suffering child was clearly this: you might get sued. Not 'you might kill the child', or 'it's illegal/unsafe/impossible' - my wife was told outright NOT to help a child who might die otherwise because of the unsubstantiated and vague threat of being sued. Have we really gotten to the point where we are willing to let those around us die rather than do everything we can to help them - because we might get sued? I suspect we have, and I suspect it's really rather sad. I suspect we're predominately a world where people would rather not get involved because it's easier to walk away than to risk the consequences of a global community hell-bent on blaming each other for every little thing. So I guess it doesn't surprise me that this was the advice given to my wife, but it does get my hackles up.

So I'm putting this out there. If you see my daughter suffering, and you know of a way to help her, please do it. I'd rather someone try to save her than for her to die while everyone covered their asses. Please notice that I said 'know' of a way to help her. Don't make up shit that might make things worse - just do your best without being reckless with her life. I guess I'm not saying to do stuff you don't know how to do, or to put yourself at risk to help her (I'm happy to do that, but I'd not expect you to). I'm simply saying that if she's in trouble, and you can help, please do. I don't mind if you borrow someone else's kit to do it - if it will save her life, get it done. I promise I'll do the same for you and yours.

TuNesday: The Mummers

First off: I’m not one to say ‘I told you so’ (actually, I totally am, but I try not to be), but a couple of notes of interest about my last few TuNesdays (see what I did there?). Faith and begorah, ‘Mumford and Sons’, the private-schooled London pop-folk band that sounds like either an Irish ensemble or a removals company went ahead and won a Brit Award for Best British Album in 2011. Nicely done, to be sure! And anyone living in the Western Hemisphere should have noticed that Adele has gone global in the last six weeks or so. The popularity of her performance of the truly beautiful ‘Someone Like You’ at those same 2011 Brit Awards not only sent that recording straight to #1 in the British charts (where it reigned supreme for four consecutive weeks and is now back at #1 again after a 2-week slide to #2), but also reinvigorated ‘Rolling in the Deep’ to #5. With two songs in the top 5 singles chart and two albums in the top 5 albums chart, The Official Charts Company announced that Adele is the first living artist to achieve the feat of two top five hits in both the Official Singles Chart and the Official Albums Chart simultaneously since The Beatles in 1964.

Now, there’s no telling whether I’ll be just as spot-on with this week’s offering. They may not have the mass appeal of the aforementioned crooners, but they are a talent that deserves to be heard. The Mummers are a band from Brighton, the cast of which seems to change with the wind. At the core, though, we find London-born singer/songwriter Raissa Khan-Panni and producer Paul Sandrone (a third core member, Mark Horwood, sadly committed suicide in 2009). ‘Mink Hollow Road’ is their second album, and ‘Fade Away’ is the second single from it. It’s a cover of a song from a 1978 Todd Rundgren album, made modern and relevant by Raissa’s vocals and the hauntingly melodic arrangement behind the lyrics. I hate the YouTube video that’s available, but if you can close your eyes and listen to the tune, you might be as moved as I am by the simplicity, honesty and innocence of its power. Maybe it's just good timing... the music and the lyrics seem to mesh well with the unseasonably warm weather we've been having here in Wales recently. When I hear this song, I sense something better on the horizon. I feel warm, dry grass between my toes; I can hear the reassuring 'klink' of ice cubes in my glass of Coca-Cola (from a glass bottle, of course); I can smell the sunshine as it warms my smiling face and my body outstretched in my back yard. To me, this song sings the promises of Spring - and that is always worth a listen.

Feelin’ It.

In general, I'm a pretty happy guy. I don't get grumpy very often. And when I do, it's usually about really silly things. You know the kinds of stuff I'm talking about: someone using cheddar cheese on a pizza, or missing the previews to a movie, or the movie theatre not having Coke. Or ice. Or Chunky Monkey – quite possibly the best ice cream ever served one painfully small wooden spoodle at a time. As you can see, most of my bad moods involve food, or the lack thereof. Not today. Today I'm grumpy for good reason. Actually, two good reasons. See…? I'm too grumpy to count. 

Trouble is, I can't do anything about either one of those reasons right now. Reason #1 is just a shitty circumstance that should clear itself up in the next few weeks. Most of the time between now and then will be pretty Oscariffic, but fingers crossed it's a situation that will turn out to be much ado about sweet FA. And no, it's not an STI or an unwanted pregnancy – in a way I wish it were. At least then I could come up with a plan of attack. Reason #2 is actually a good thing, but it's one of those good things that has to suck hard before it's any good – and even then, when it gets good, the best it's ever going to be is slightly different than what you'd hoped for originally. Not better, not worse, just… different. Think of it as the emotional equivalent to The Phantom Menace. Eventually, all that 'younglings' thing works out OK, but fuck me if you don't have to earn it.

Moods, huh. Who needs 'em?

Ironic, or genius that this is the first thing to make me smile all day…?